I had a lovely day yesterday. I took my friend Karen out for her birthday lunch.
Karen is the daughter of the friend Lynne that I did caregiving for, for so many years.
I have become like a second Mom to Karen.
She so enjoyed eating out and chatting . It was the first time she had eaten in a restaurant in several years. She has a wonderful person who stays with Lynne regularly and has given Karen some freedom on her days off from work. We laughed, caught up on Life , ate delicious food and just relaxed for a while.
This photo is from several months ago. These were better days for Lynne.
Its so tragic what Alzheimers has done to my sweet friend.
Lynne is no longer Lynne...
I chatted with her for about a minute and asked her What's new? Sometimes this gives her a chance to put her thoughts together..
She finally said , Oh it was wonder...ful in very slurred speech. I asked her what was wonderful but she couldn't get the words out.
It was lunch time so I asked her if she was hungry, she said yes so I went to make her a sandwich all the while trying to make conversation. Instead she just closed her eyes and went into a deep sleep.
Lynne no longer walks and has a new wheelchair that isn't just a transport chair like she had before, and a hoist for getting her in and out of bed...no more trips to the bathroom either.
Things have changed so rapidly that it just hurts my heart.
Seeing her yesterday really confirmed my decision to no longer be one of her care givers.
The care would be too difficult for me on so many different levels.
I'm not going to post the photo I took of her yesterday. Its too, too sad, but I have to have it for myself.
Alzheimers truly is devastating and is called The Long Goodbye.
When this will finally end I have no idea but God knows and she is in His hands.
Always be Grateful
Always be Kind
15 comments:
I think your friend Lynne is somehow aware of your care and your love, but her response is tucked away too far on the inside to get it out in the open. You are so kind to her and to her daughter.
I watched my grandmother go through this. It is so horrible. But I think you did the right thing in your decision about caregiving. You did so much, as much as you could.
That was very nice meeting Karen for lunch. Also nice that you stopped to see Lynne and made her lunch. It is all so sad. Keeping her in my prayers and ((HUGS)) to you.
That is so sad. That was nice of you to take Karen out for lunch. I’m sure she enjoyed it in more ways than you can imagine. I bet that was hard to see your friend, Lynne. Alzheimers scares me more than heart disease or cancer. I wish they would find a cure soon.
Alzheimers is such a hard disease. I think it's even harder for family and friends than it is for the patient. I'm glad you got to spend some time with Karen. I'm sure it meant a lot to her.
I am sure Karen enjoyed spending time with you, someone who knows her mother very well and can understand what she's going through. Yes, you made the right decision to turn Lynne's care over to others. It becomes much too difficult for those so close to her, but also the physical aspect is very hard when they can't help themselves anymore. It's very hard to see our loved ones go through something like this. We can only pray that God will be a comfort to her in ways we cannot see, and that He will carry her through all the way home. (((hugs))) for you. God bless you for being such a loving friend.
Oh Sue, how sad. But you have no regrets, you were such a loving friend and caregiver for as long as you could. Parkensens is another difficult decease. We had two friends that have suffered so bad. The owner of the Tahoe cabin has been suffering with it for several years, and this morning we got word he had left this old world and is in his heavenly home with Jesus. Grieving, but also know the freedom of no more pain, and his dear wife has been his caregiver and she is not in the best of health. Makes Heaven look all the better. What memories we have of our times with you and Dave in Tahoe.
What an emotional day! Your taking Karen out for a much-needed lunch is so very kind. You said it had been years ... wow, the things I take for granted! While there's nothing to be done about Lynn's disease (and I'm certainly no expert!) instinctively I feel your presence and listening ears are a precious gift -- both to Lynn and Karen. Thank you for showing us what it means to be a Real Friend.
I am so happy for you and Karen that you had time together, and a day out from the stresses of life with Alzheimer's. I agree with everyone else that you did everything you could do for Lynne, including loving her and I know she feels it somewhere inside.
How very sad to see your friend declining. Alzheimer's is such a difficult disease. I'm sure that Karen appreciated the time out having lunch with you
You are such a huge blessing to others. I am so sorry for your friend Lynne. Alzheimers is such a devastating disease and it is so very sad to watch friends and loved one go through this. I know this was a wonderful outing for Karen. Bless her heart, it so hard to have a job and also to be a part time care giver.
My grandmother died with this disease and it was hard to lose her in that way. Heartbreaking to watch a person lose their vibrancy. Thank you for linking up.
I don't understand it at all - but I still have to believe. I am so sorry.
That is so sad. Alzheimers is such a devastating disease.
I have some dear friends (they are a wonderful couple who have been married for over 60 years) that are both going through it now and it so heartbreaking to watch their decline. My mother had dementia as well.
This is such a cruel disease because it robs the individuals afflicted and those who care for and about them of so many good times. You were a good friend to Lynne and continue to be and now with her daughter as well, so no regrets.
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